Friday, February 25, 2011

5 Question Friday

1. Can you drive a stick shift?
Parents made me learn when I was 16 & then my first car was a stick. I drive one again because I think it's more fun than an automatic! (I'm weird, I know!)

2. What are two foods you just can't eat?
Popcorn & Carrots

3. Do you buy Girl Scout Cookies? What is your favorite kind?
Peanut butter 

4. How do you pamper yourself?
Manicures, pedicures & massages...all with a good cup of Starbucks

5. What is your nickname and how did you get it?
Buge figure it out ;-)

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Pour Your Heart Out

I decided to try something a bit different this Wednesday. I saw it last week over at The Kir Corner & thought it was a great idea! If you want to learn more about Pour Your Heart Out, check it out here.

I want to try to breastfeed LP. There, I said it! I know it is taboo & can cause some uproar in the community, but I do not care! I have been doing research on different ways it can be possible & what it can take.

I have always been a huge fan of breastfeeding & just because I cannot have a biological child, that shouldn't be the reason I do not at least try that for both me & my child.

I am not saying I will do it, I am not saying I will be able to do it, but I sure want to try. And you know what else?! If I can't breastfeed, I am thinking about milk sharing so LP can get breast milk if I am unable to provide it.

My DH & I both feel strongly about how much better this is for a child, but we also know it may not be possible. It's worth a shot though & we do not care what people may think!

Monday, February 21, 2011


How is it February ICLW already?!

There have been a lot of changes going on for me lately. I am happy to say that I feel better than I have in YEARS!!!

We are also on the list for our LP & have been told that hopefully by March 1 we will have a better time line & can better know when to expect the referral, travel, etc! I cannot believe we are finally to this point in our journey. It is so surreal :D

We will now start planning our baby shower, as we have decided to do it before LP coming home. But until then....we are just preparing for vacation. Hopefully our last big one as a family of 2! (I know, I said this last year too...but this year I really mean it)

I'll end this with a random fact about me! Say 'hello' & leave a random fact about you!

My dream job is to be a dermatologist!

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Protect Women's Health

I am sure you have heard by now of the outrageous craziness that is going on in the House of Representatives.

If the amendment goes into law, the measure would cut $330 million through the end of September for the Planned Parenthood.

To me this has nothing to do with your political views; I do not care if you are Republican or Democrat, but I do care that we all ban together & not let women loose their rights!

Planned Parenthood is a place where women (and men) can get the proper treatment they need. They can go here knowing they will not be judged & their rights protected. This is an organization that I believe in & hope you do too.

This is not about abortions, Planned Parenthood also provides family planning, HIV tests and preventative cancer and other medical screenings.

This is about making sure that we women, have a place to get the vital care that we need if it! This is about our bodies!


  • Send a letter supporting Planned Parenthood and demanding that their funding be maintained.
  • Give money to Planned Parenthood so they can spend the next 10 days fighting for their funding and women’s rights.
  • Attend a rally (or start one!) to let your representatives and the country know that support for women’s health is not negotiable.
  • Donate your Twitter or Facebook status to supporting women and Planned Parenthood.

Saturday, February 19, 2011


What a week! Sorry I have no been around much, but as a lot of you know, my grandfather had something called a TIA, which is pretty much a sign that a stroke will be coming for him here in the future.

Sadly, my grandpa is not a stranger to medical issues; he is however, one hell of a fighter! He has been in congestive heart failure for 29 years & had cancer twice. His strength & drive is something to be admired by us all & I know if he can do it, I can face anything I am given too.

Being the oldest grandchild, him being in the hospital as put a lot on my shoulders as my parents were not able to make it back into town until yesterday. Until my parents made it back, I Had to worry about work & my grandparents. Going between the 2. Making sure my grandmother ate & that they understood everything the doctors told them.

I am in no ways complaining, as I am soooo very lucky! I am 29 & still have all 4 of my grandparents, what a blessing! This has, however been an emotionally draining & tiring week.

I am happy to say that he is back home & will just be seeing a neurologist from time to time so they can keep an eye on him & try to catch a stroke soon, when it does happen. I want to thank you for all your thoughts for my family during this time, once again all my Twitter & blog friends have come to my "rescue." I've said it before & I will continue to say all are so wonderful & I would be truly lost without each of you!

Thursday, February 17, 2011


So there have been a lot of changes in the last 10 weeks!

10 weeks ago today I had my surgery & within the past couple of weeks I have really started feeling human again. When they say you never realize how bad you felt until you feel good-they are sure telling the truth!

I feel like I have gotten my life back. I've been working out again & just eating better. I have more energy & I do not feel like everything is hard. I am not in pain & everyone says my color is better, along with the fact that I just sound better (I love it!!)

So now that I was feeling better I decided it was the perfect time to splurge & get Lasik, so for a week now I have been able to see! Between my eyes & the surgery, I have just felt like a new woman, I just felt like there was 1 thing more that needed changed, hence the picture!!

That is right, that hair will be donated & I am now dawning a new, sexy, short 'do!!

I am ready, I am ready for 2011 & all that is coming. I feel like a new person, so I'm ready!

Monday, February 14, 2011

Happy Valentine's Day

Wishing you all a wonderful Valentine's Day! I hope each of you have a great day full of love, laughter & joy!

It's hard to believe that this could very much be our last Valentine's Day of just the 2 of us. I love the idea of having our LP home with us for Valentine's day next year, dressed up all cute of course!!

To my little Valentine, somewhere in Colombia (because in my heart I know you are born) Mommy & Daddy already love you so very much & cannot wait to have you home with us! Next year we hope to celebrate this day of love with you, our little miracle!

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Saturday, February 5, 2011


When you are told over & over for years that you will never have a biological child, you eventually become okay with that fact. Then when you find out your husband has azoo, you deal & you move on. The idea of ever getting pregnant leaves all thoughts for you.

For me, I mourned & then I moved forward. Seeing pregnant women no longer hurt my heart; going to baby showers no longer became a reason for me to work that day. I truly became at peace with everything & felt this was the path the DH & I were meant to be on.

So when Dr. Phonebook told me yesterday I needed to take an HPT because I could possibly be having a miscarriage, I just could not wrap my brain around it. I CAN:t get pregnant, so why are we worried I am/was?! What? How? <>

Now, why would Dr. Phonebook even think any of this? My surgery was 8 weeks ago Thursday & I have been bleeding every other week for 6 of those. The first couple of times, I thought no big deal. I mean it was the worst 'period' I have ever had; the pain, the cramps, the clots, get the point. I just figured that was my body dealing with the loss & cleaning out, so I did not think much of it. When I talked to my acupuncturist, he thought the same ok.

Then this week when it started it was bright red, very heavy with some more clots. I have NEVER had bright red. After it didn't change after a few days, I figured that is when I needed to call Dr. Phonebook-little did I know that call would throw me for one heck of a loop.

First I cried because of the thought of miscarrying, then I cried because how did this happen, then I cried because I wasn't prepared for any of this!

I did go take a pregnancy test...which let me tell you, I forgot how expensive those things were! I also wanted to be like Steve Martin in Father of the Bride. I didn't need 2 hpt's, I only needed 1. I was going to start ripping the 1 out, just like he did with the hot dog buns!!

I took the test & I must say, that was the most beautiful negative I have seen. That helped to reassure me that I was not miscarrying & my body is just still adjusting to everything.

I do have an appt. with Dr. P on Monday afternoon to try to figure out what is going on. I must say though this all made me realize a lot.

Before I say what it helped me realize, I just want to remind people this blog is here so I can get my feelings out, so pllllllllllleeeeeaaaassssse, do not judge!

I do not want to be pregnant. I want to completely 110% wipe that thought from my brain. I am not cut out to be pregnant for sooooo many reasons. 1) my body sucks 2) my brain no longer can wrap itself around the thought of being pregnant, getting pregnant, staying pregnant, etc. 3) my baby is in Colombia & wouldn't have it any other way.

The whole ordeal yesterday sent me on an emotional roller coaster I was not prepared for & for everyone that was there for me, thank you!

I just want to figure out what is going on & going back to my happy place where I cannot get pregnant & forget it can even happen.

Friday, February 4, 2011

The Call Questions

-No, I am sorry...we do not know when we will get the call.
-No, we do not know what month, day, week they will call
-No, we do not know how long it will be before they call
-Yes, it can be tomorrow; yes it could be in 6 months; yes it could be in 12 months
-No, I am not sure if they will call me or the DH first
-Yes, when we get the call, I will let you know
-No matter how many times you ask me, I cannot tell you anything different
-Yes, if you keep asking me, I will move you to the bottom of the list of people to tell when we get the call

These are some of my favorite questions that we are asked everyday! Oh my this is going to get old.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

New Wordless Wednesday

My Lasik was canceled-hoping I can reschedule ASAP

Wordless Wednesday-Inner Peace

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Lasik Surgery

Tomorrow will be a life changing surgery for me!!! I will be able to see without glasses or contacts!

I said I would wait & do Lasik as a 30th birthday present to myself, however the DH feels that if I don't do it now, I probably will not do it once LP is home. (He knows me too well & I know is right)

This surgery makes me more nervous than anything I've ever had, because the thought of being awake scares the living crap out of me! I hope that valium they give me kicks in fast & does what it is supposed to!!

I hear this will be the best surgery I can ever have. After being in glasses (mostly) since I was 14, I am ready! I am excited to wake up & see the alarm clock, to not have to worry about see LP with my eyes, glasses free!!

I hear this will be some of the best money I can ever come on....let's get this show on the road!

Happy early 30th to me!!
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