Sunday, January 31, 2010

Guest Blogger: Michelle

Michelle has been there & done that! She has 2 beautiful children through domestic infant adoption. She is an experienced blogger when it comes to adoption & you can find her on Grown in My Heart, an adoption network site & her personal blog of Gotcha Baby.

Every family is different, unique in various ways. When my husband and I decided to adopt, we knew we’d be creating our family, but we had no idea how, exactly, it would happen. There were days when we were filling out paperwork and crunching numbers that we weren’t sure it would happen. The initial adoption preparations kept us busy for about four months—the classes, the making of a profile book, the collecting of references, all of it gave us a sense of purpose. The exact procedure on preparing to adopt varies from state to state, but for domestic adoption, typically once you are “home study approved” and you’ve gotten your profile book (or web profile) together, you begin the wait. You begin the wait to be chosen by an expectant mother who is considering adoption. You begin to wait for your social worker or lawyer to call, to tell you that you are in the running or that an expectant mother would like to meet you. The wait could be short, or the wait could be more than a year. The wait is not easy.

I say that, but honestly, our wait was short. Our wait was only four months long, and the adoption of our daughter was as smooth and by-the-book as it could be. Macey came home in August 2005, and our family of three was made. Macey’s is an open adoption, which means we have exchanged identifying information with her birthparents, and, in our case, we have frequent contact. In February 2008, her birthmother asked us if we would be able to parent the child she was expecting, due in June.

Without a moment’s hesitation, we jumped back onto the paperwork treadmill. We updated our home study, made arrangements for adoption leave, and prepared to welcome home Macey’s brother. Nothing is final until the placement paperwork is signed, but we knew either way, Macey would be becoming a big sister. Late on the evening of June 20, 2008, we were invited to the hospital to be there when Junior entered the world. A few days later, we brought him home.

Six years ago, as we were in the middle of being poked and prodded by our RE, had someone told me that we’d be parents to two amazing children, I would have thought it was just wishful thinking. Now we have a daughter who is almost five, and a son who is almost two. Families are made in different ways, and the way ours has been made couldn’t be better.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

My Bags Are Packed


And I'm ready to go!

I have so been looking forward to this vacation for months! So much so that I even packed in advance. (I don't do that! If my flight is at 8am, I'm packing at 5am)

I have a feeling this will be our "last vacation." (You can read all about this over on my Conceive Blog) I think that may be part of the excitement. The other part is I get my hubby all to myself for 12 whole days. No work, no phone, no nothing! Just us, the sun, beach & some fun.

Ever since I started my blog back mid last year, I have not gone for very long without writing, so it will seem a bit odd not to write about the going ons of my life for 2 whole weeks. I am excited though that I will have some of my first guest bloggers.

Jenn over at The Road to Happily Ever After has been nice enough to agree to blog sit for me. She will be posting 3 wonderful post from guest bloggers that will kind of take you along the adoption journey. We have an adoption "newbie," one that is in waiting & one that has already adopted; so I am very excited to share these with you, so please be on the look out!

"See" you guys in a few weeks & don't forget that when I get back I will be making THE BIG announcement of where we are adopting from. Until then, Bon Voyage!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Me, a Beautiful Blogger?! Gee Thanks

Thank you so very much to my dear friend Jenn over at The Road To Happily Ever After for this award.

Thank the person who nominated you for this award.
Copy the award and place it in your blog.
Link the person who nominated you for this award.
Tell us 7 interesting things about you.
Nominate 7 bloggers.
Post the links to the 7 bloggers you nominate.


Seven Things About Me

*I am all about Asian culture. Ever since going to Asia when I was 14, I have just wanted to learn everything I could about it. My house is done in mostly Asian decor. I find it interesting, peaceful and just very me

*My favorite movie of all times is Splash. Yes, the one with the mermaid in NYC (totally cheesey)

*I have 4 tattoos (5th on the way) & 10 piercings

*I have something with polka dots. I did not even realize it until my DH pointed it out to me..but anything polka dot, I am all for!

*I have seen the Who perform 3 times

*I have been to over 20 countries & have so many more I want to go to

*I was the 2nd LT. on my dance team in high school

Seven bloggers I pass this award on to are...

Heather aka FertilityChick


Courtney aka MommaRoberts07

Becca aka TTC_Queen

Courtney aka _courtn3y

Lisa aka WaitingLisa

Kaitlin aka ahmymarriedlife







Tuesday, January 26, 2010

This Time Newt Week

Ahhh HAL's private Island of Half Moon Kay!

Where in the World?

Where in the world are we adopting from?!

I asked my hubby a fun way to tell you guys where we would be adopting from-as I just do not want to blurt it out. Now, you will not be finding out for sure until AFTER my vacation, but I thought I would start you off with a few random fact, as per my hubby's suggestion.

Now, if from my hints, you do have a guess or two of where it could be, please just DM or email me. BUT if you are right, I just ask that you please do not leave it on here as a comment or say it on Twitter...thanks!

So here are a few hints for you:


-Slightly less than three times the size of Montana
-Median age is 27.1
-18.8% of their labor force is industry
-They have 876 unpaved airport runways
-The average criminal sentence length is 137 years
-The electricity is mostly 110 volts AC
-World’s third-leading producer of women’s lingerie

So there you go, just a few random facts! Got an idea where our baby is coming from?

Saturday, January 23, 2010

The Love Myth


One of the biggest myths about adoption is that you will never love your adopted child as much as you love or would have loved your biological child.

I am not yet a mother nor will I ever have a biological child, so I do not know if I am truly one to speak, but I do not see how this is true.

We have not even filled out all of our paperwork yet or have our names on the list & I am already so in love with our future child it is crazy. It is amazing to me that right now, as I type, my future child could possibly be being made. That my child, with ten little toes & ten little fingers, is growing inside his/her mother.

The love I already feel amazes me, as you hear stories about how "only a mother could love like this or that" & without even meeting our child, or having a face to go with our baby, I am in love.

I imagine my love will only grow & will explode the day I get to actually hold our baby. The day I get to bring our baby home to our forever home.

Do I think I would love a biological child before it was born? Of course! Do I think I would feel differently if I birthed a child compared to adopting? Not at all! I do not have to birth my child to love him or her.

I do not understand the myth & as we get further into the process & I begin to love our child a bit more everyday, it makes the myth even harder for me to grasp.

Will I ever know if I would love a biological child more? No...but in my heart, I see no difference.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Welcome IComLeavWe


Welcome everyone! I am so excited to be part of my first ever IComLeavWe :)

A bit of info on our TTC journey & how we have ended up where we are:

I was diagnosed with PCOS, endometriosis, fibroids & adhesions prior to even meeting my hubby. I was very up front with him when we met & by the time I had met him, I had already had 2 surgeries to deal with everything.

I always knew it would be harder for me to get pregnant & adoption was something that I had always considered (again, before my dh). After almost 2 years together & no baby & 2 more surgeries for me, they decided to run test on my husband. Much to our surprise he has Azoo.

With our combined diagnoses we decided to forgo any fertility treatments due to the fact that we had an extremely low chance of getting pregnant, carrying to term. We decided to take all the funds we would have put towards treatments & start our adoption process!

We are very pleased to announce that we are starting all of the paperwork for our international adoption.

You can follow our journey on my blog here & also on my Conceive blog!

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

We Are Adopting...

**INTERNATIONALLY**

Let The "Baby Making" Commence

They always say you remember where you conceived your child. For us, it started on the kitchen table last night! That is right, we were wild & crazy & did it right on the table....we got out a nice ink pen & begin to fill out all our adoption paper work, so that we could "conceive" our baby.

As we started filling out all the paperwork, I could not help but tease my hubby & ask him if this was a romantic as he thought it would be when we made our baby!

It is great though, it really is. As interesting as some of the questions are & some are a pain; I was looking up things in files from 4 years ago, it will be so worth it!

The paperwork amazes me & I do kind of feel like the lady pictured in my post. It is overwhelming, exciting, scary & surreal. I cannot believe this is all really happening. We really are starting to bury ourselves in paperwork to get our child.

I hope that all the paperwork is in & done within 2 weeks & then we will hopefully be ready to announce that we are paper pregnant!!!

Friday, January 15, 2010

They Grow Up So Fast



























My little man is 3 today!! Here are a few now & then shots for you. The Day I brought him home, Feb 2007 & Now my little guy all grown up!


Time flies! They say that when you have kids, one day they are newborns, the next thing you know, they are going to senior prom & moving away to college.


I never thought this little guy would bring me such joy & love. I remember my mom & I went & I picked him out on a Friday afternoon. My mom kept trying to get me to bring him home that day. I refused, I felt like I needed to get the house ready. I wanted everything just right for my new addition. In no way was I going to bring a dog home to a house that was totally not ready for such a little thing-I needed to prepare!


I told the breeder I would be back on Sunday to get him. Needless to say that weekend was insane for me. I was at pet stores & did research as to how was the best way to crate train him (play pen btw). I was at baby stores looking for play pens & picking out little clothes. You would have thought I was 9 month pregnant & being induced in 2 days. I was crazy!


The night before I brought him home I started freaking. Oh my, I am now going to be in charge of this little puppy. I thought about how my life would change; how I wouldn't be able to just take off for a weekend without finding a sitter, or how I had to worry about all his needs, etc. For me, this was a huge deal. (Now here I am doing an actual mom freak out beginning & now the one with Kiso seemed so easy!)


That afternoon I went & got him & brought him home was one of the craziest, happiest days. I can only imagine if I was this happy for a dog, what it will be like when I bring my child home. I will be a crazy!


I sometimes feel that Kiso was great practice for a kid, at least for a few weeks! He would not sleep at all! He would cry all night long, need to be hand fed & I looked like a mom that just had a baby!


I cannot wait to be writing a blog like this when my child turns 3. To look back & see how they have changed & grown & the joy they have brought to the DH & I.


Until then, Happy Birthday to the lil man in my life!


Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Sunday, January 10, 2010

I'm Pouting!!

I'm pouting! It's not fair! All the paperwork & money that comes along with being infertile. I do not care if you go through treatments or if you adopt, all the lovely extras that come with it are just not fair.

We already cannot have kids, so if that is not a big enough stress on us, why not add a stack of paper work to it & charge us out the butt to get our child(ren)?!

I do not get it. If I were fertile & able to have a child, nobody would ask how I was going to get the money to pay for my kid & I sure would not be filling out paperwork on my medical history. To make is real fun, for adoption I get to go to the police station & be fingerprinted to prove I am not a criminal.

We should not have to worry about how we are paying to get our kids now, we should only be saving up so they can go to college in the future.

I guess I don't understand all the extra stress for us. If infertiles were the ones running the fertility clinics & adoption agencies, I think things would be very different. They would get it, they would understand how it is just not right to add this stress to our already crappy situation!

As I start all my adoption paperwork, it just frustrates me. I get why I have to do it all, but it does not mean I like it.

So to everyone who goes for a fertility treatment & has to fill out paper after paper or to the couple taking out loans to give the adoption agency; I pout for you!!

We Have A Winner!!


Thank you to everyone for the birthday wishes & celebrating my birthday with me!

I am pleased to announce the winner of the shirt from CafePress. The winner that random.org picked is <>.....

Tiffany from Youngbutinfertile.com! Congrats Tiffany :) Please just contact me with your address so I can get your shirt out for you!

Thanks again to everyone for celebrating.

Friday, January 8, 2010

Miss You!

That is right, I miss you guys! I feel like I have been slacking on my blog thus far in 2010 & my twitter...well, that has really gone down hill!

Between starting the Conceive blog & really diving into the adoption process, I feel like I have not been giving other things the attention they need...so I am sorry!

I promise I will get my ducks in a row here soon & will catch back up!

Until then, lots of baby dust to you all!

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Celebrate My Birthday With Me





















It's my birthday, so do you know what that means?! Gifts! I mean, who doesn't love a good birthday gift? But instead of me getting a gift for my birthday...YOU will get a chance to get a gift from me!

That is right, I am giving you the chance to win a gift from me in order to help me celebrate turning 28.

This gift is great for anyone in the adoption process, anyone that has adopted, or if you just want something fun. Cafepress (whom I love!) has made this birthday gift possible, so thank you Cafepress!

You will have a chance to win this shirt (along with a few other goodies I throw in) to help me celebrate. All you have to do is leave a comment on this blog telling me what your favorite birthday gift ever was, (before getting this gift from me of course!) Want another chance to be entered? Just Tweet "I entered to win the best birthday gift from @PCOSChick Want more details:http://tinyurl.com/yaqmbb9 . Want a third entry?! Add my button to your blog & email me a link to it.

So it's that easy to celebrate with me! I will be ending the give away at midnight this Saturday, the 9th & announcing the winner on the 10th. I will pick the winner using random.org...so don't miss out!

Thanks for celebrating with me!!

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Timeline

11/2001-Diagnosed with Endro.
12/2001-Surgery for endro & cyst
2001-2006 No period & lots of problems
4/2007-First RE visit, diagnosed with PCOS
5/2007-Ovarian Drilling (and some more)
5/2008-Married
11/2008-Ovarian Wedging (and a lot more)
12/2008-Given ok & 6 months to get pregnant
5/2009-Still no PG, more test
7/2009-HSG, All clear
8/2009-SA #1 for DH, Azoo
8/2009-SA #2 for DH, Azoo
9/2009-Urologist appt. for DH, doesn't look good-slim chance
9/2009-Decide to go with adoption to build our family
10/2009- Yet another lap, or yearly cleaning as I like to now call it
10/2009-Adoption classes
11/2009-Announce we are adopting
1/2010-Decided on a country-COLOMBIA
1/2010-Get hooked up with great agency
1/2010-Send in application to Agency
2/2010-Draft Application sent to Colombia
3/2010-Application received in Colombia, awaiting to find out when the board will review it
3/2010-Send in child abuse clearance forms
4/2010-Approved by orphanage
5/2010-All Paperwork sent to be apostilled
6/2010-8 of the forms come back as incorrect
6/2010-Finally get child abuse clearance back for Mrs-still waiting for Mr
6/2010-Contract & payment sent for Homestudy
6/2010-5th Lap
7/2010-Find out Lap was not successful due to extreme scarring adhesions on left side
7/2010-Choose to remove left ovary &  tube & fix bowels. Surgery scheduled Dec. 9
7/2010-Start homestudy
7/2010-Finish all our dossier paperwork & it's sent to Colombia 8/5
8/25/2010-Homestudy
8/2010-FINALLY get one of the Mr's child abuse clearances
9/2010-Homestudy Draft Received
9/2010- Fire inspection
9/2010- Mr gets his FBI Fingerprints
10/2010- I finally get my FBI Fingerprints
10/2010- Send FBI fingerprints to be apostilled
10/2010- Home study APPROVED!
10/2010-Fingerprints apostilled
11/2010- Everything sent to Colombia
12/9/2010- Left Ovary & tube removed
12/2010- Fingerprints for I800A
1/24/2011-I800A approval
2/2011- On the list & waiting for referral
5/6/2011- Receive a referral for a little girl & sadly have to turn it down; told could get a new referral by end of the month
5/8/2011- Baby shower for our LP
5/9/2011- Have lump removed from my right breast
6/2011- Cleared from surgeon, lump was cancer free
7/2011- Told by agency more than likely, referral won't happen until 2012
9/2011- Abnormal pap, will have to have colposcopy
10/2011- Colposcopy shows no sign of cancer, paps every 6 months
10/4/2011- Leave the Colombian adoption program & decide to go domestic
10/2011- Decide to take a 6-12 month break before starting domestic infant adoption
12/22/2011- Find out I have to have my a mass over 9cm on my spleen
12/27/2011- Meet with surgeon regarding spleen..it has to go, surgery scheduled
1/2012- Turn the big 3-0
1/20/2012- Spleen removed, in hospital for 5 days
2/9/2012- Develop blood clots in my lungs, back in the hospital for 3 days
2/13/2012- Start at Coumadin clinic to be watched while I take blood thinners for 6-12 months
3/20/2012- Blood levels finally leveling out
5/2012- 4 year anniversary
5/13/2012- Homestudy renewal...canceled, DH gets called for jury duty
1/2013- Off blood thinners!!!
4/2013 - Have offer of surrogate..start looking into surrogacy or even IVF for us
5/2013- Celebrate 5 year anniversary
5/22/2013- Meet with new RE to see if IVF is an option, as we decided surrogacy is too $. Everything looks good on my end, sends us to IF Urologist
6/7/13- Urologist appt for DH
6/27/13- Bloodwork from urologist comes back, DH has Y chromosome defect. IVF off 
7/13- Decide to put house on market & sell it the night before we do
7/13- Move into tiny 1 bdrm apt while we start building a house
9/10/13- Saw a waiting child online & contacted about him
9/12/13- Received his medical records
9/16-9/19/13- Lots of research, going over medical records, etc
9/19/13- Find out another couple has requested his records-heart breaks
9/20/13- Speak with Cincinnati Children's on this little guys records. Dr's last sentiment was 'hang up the phone & call the agency right away, do not lose this little guy'
9/20/13- Tell the agency we wish to move forward with the adoption. They inform us they will accept no other applications on him
9/21/13- Fill out a 3 page 'survey' on why we feel we would be good parents
9/23/13- Speak with agency, they have accepted us & congratulate us on becoming PARENTS!! 
10/14/13- Letter of Intent 
10/16/13- First homestudy done
10/18/13- Fire inspection, fingerprints & police checks
10/22/13- Only paperwork that needs to go to Chinese consulate in Houston sent
10/25/13- Homestudy visit #2
10/29/13- Homestudy visit #3
11/1/13- 4th & last homestudy visit
11/1/13- First forms back from the Chinese Consulate!!
11/4/13- Last of forms sent to be state certified 
11/11/13- Receive first videos of our little guy!!
11/12/13- 10 documents sent to Chinese Consulate in NY, only thing left for dossier is Homestudy
11/19/13- Paperwork back from Chinese Consulate, waiting for OH to provide child abuse clearance, so our homestudy can be finished. 
11/20/13- Adoption agency approves homestudy
11/29/13- After going to state reps, got Ohio Child Abuse Clearances back
12/2/13- Official homestudy approval
12/3/13- Homes study county certified & sent to state
12/4/13- Everything sent in for I800A 
12/10/13- Homestudy received back from state-travel info from agency received
12/11/13- Homestudy sent to consulate (last thing for dossier!) 
12/11/13- USCIS sent official receipt notice for I800A 
1/27/13- Receive notice from USCIS that our homestudy agency left out their Hague accreditation. Have until 3/8/14 to get this to them.
2/3/14- I800A approval!
2/4/14- I800A sent for state certification
2/10/14- I800A received back from state & off to consulate 
2/18/14- I800A received back from consulate & off to agency 
2/21/14- DTC (Dossier to China)!!!!
2/27/14- LID (Long in Date)
4/29/14- LOA (Letter of Acceptance)
5/23/14- I800 Approval
6/17/14- Article 5 
6/30/14- TA (Travel Approval)
7/1/14- Got our Consulate Appointment
7/10/14- Leave for China
7/14/14- Family Day!!!!!!
7/18/14- Off to Guangzhou
7/23/14- US Consulate Appointment
7/24/14- Find out the US Visa/Passport system is down-stuck in China
7/29/14- Make it home (finally)
5/4/15-  A's cochlear surgery
7/14/15- 1 year home
1/6/16- Mama's birthday & I find a waiting child online. Contact the agency & get medical paperwork
1/8/16- Speak with Cincinnati Children's on this little guys records. Dr's last sentiment was 'scoop him up & how do you get these great little guys?!'
1/19/16-Start Homestudy 
1/21/16- BCI/FBI Fingerprints
1/29/16- Official acceptance to adopt our little guy from Korea 
2/2/16- First homestudy visit 
2/8/16- Babes first stitches. Get a report from Korea that F had a little accident
2/16/16- Fire Inspection
2/20/16- 5 hour day of psychological exams for our homestudy
2/23/16- Homestudy visit #2  
3/8/16- Homestudy visit #3 (last one) 
3/9/16- Homestudy draft sent to agency & Child abuse clearances from Ohio received!
3/31/16- Open Lap due to more endo, adhesions & fibroids 
4/4/16- Homestudy approved (FINALLY!!) Official wait for F to come home begins
4/12/16- Acceptance packet sent to Korea
4/19/16- Everything sent in for I600A 
5/26/16- Fingerprints for USCIS I600A
6/2/16- I600A approval
6/7/16- I600 sent to USCIS
7/18/16-Informed S. Korea will no longer accept our FBI fingerprints on state letterhead, have to redo them & get them on FBI letterhead 
7/19/16- New FBI background checks back! 
7/22/19- USCIS I-600 Notification 
11/8/16- EP submission-should have court date in 1-2 months
11/16/16- Court logged in case
11/17/16- Judge assignment
12/7/16- Court Date received
1/13/17- Travel to S. Korea
1/16/17-First meeting with F
1/18/17-2nd meeting with F
1/19/17-Court Date
1/25/17-Preapproval  
2/20/17-  Final approval!!

  
















 
Template: Blog Designs by Sheila