A Foster Sister

Every report we receive on A talks of his foster sister. How he is good about sharing with her & playing with her. When we received our videos of A back in November, she was in these videos. When you watch the videos with the 2 of them, you can see the sibling rivalry between them. You can see the love he has for her & the patience she has to help him do everyday things. I kept telling myself I needed to find out if she had a family, but I would get busy with things & forget.

We received another update on A yesterday & once again, this little girl was mentioned. This reminded me, I needed to start looking to see if she had a family, see what I could find out about this little girl that means so much to my son.

Yesterday I finally did it..I started looking to see if she had a family & surprisingly it didn't take as long as I thought it would to locate them. I started making 3 post on Facebook in different adoption groups. I explained I knew what she looked like & the bit I knew & could guess about her. I had a few people answer that they had a child that met the description, but in a different city, etc. Finally one lady wrote saying her daughter matched the description & was in the same city. I wrote back a few questions for her, but while I waited for her answer I decided to go stalk look through her page. Wouldn't you know, a few post in her page & there was the only picture of her daughter & it was her!!! I about jumped out of my chair.

The lady then proceeded to friend me on Facebook & ask me for my email. She wanted to send me a better picture of her daughter just to make sure it really was her. When I opened up my email, there was no doubt in my mind...this was the kind little girl that is A's sister. In order to confirm this I was able to send her back 2 videos that we received with her in it. When I sent these videos I had no idea that they had never seen a video of their daughter. She told me what a blessing I was & what joy I brought them by sharing these videos.

We went on to talk on & off throughout the day. I found out they leave tomorrow, Friday, to head to China to get their daughter. They plan on trying to meet the foster mother & hopefully get a 'look' at A for us.

She asked for a picture of A to put in her daughters room so that she had a piece of China to come home to. We are already talking about Skyping & visits.

I am so happy I was able to locate this family & I am excited for all there is to come. I know it will be hard for these 2, but I hope by being able to keep in touch, it will be of some comfort to them.

Derrick Coleman

Derrick Coleman was just another name to me until I became A's mom. To tell you the truth, I am not even sure if I really knew who he was. Now, that has all changed!

If you have not seen the above commercial, please take a moment to watch this inspirational man. Watch him show people that no matter what may try to stand in your way, that you can do anything! I love this guy for his message to everyone, but especially to the hearing impaired and deaf community.

When I found out he would be going to the Super Bowl, I started a quest to find a jersey of his for A. I wanted to have this jersey, not because we are big Seahwak fans, but because I wanted the jersey as a reminder. Something that A could have & know that anything is possible when he puts his mind to it. I finally found one last Friday, which I am so thankful for & it was delivered today...the day after the Super Bowl. The day after a Super Bowl was won by a team with the first deaf player playing in it. Derrick did it! He not only played in the NFL, he then made it to the Super Bowl, where his team won. Oh & if you are counting..his name was also the first name said when it came to a play once the game started.

As I watched the pregame show & the anthem being signed...as they paned over to Derrick, I couldn't help but getting choked up. This Super Bowl was different, this Super Bowl was so much more than football to me.

I heard other parents of deaf and hard of hearing children talk about how excited they were to watch Derrick, how they hoped that now people would see; see that deaf and hard of hearing people can do anything.

I can only hope that this amazing man has helped to really make a path for kids and also to show the world, that there is nothing a person that cannot hear isn't able to do.

I truly wish I could thank Derrick, thank him for all he has done & will continue to do. I am so excited to tell A about this man & give him his jersey...so he knows, he too can do anything!

Year of the Horse

Happy Chinese New Year!! This is the year of the Horse....2014!

This is our first Chinese New Year as A's parents. Even though he is not here with us yet, we will be celebrating & cannot wait for him to be here next year to join in the festivities.

What is the Chines New Year? Chinese New Year is an important traditional Chinese holiday celebrated at the turn of the Chinese calendar. In China, it is also known as the Spring Festival, the literal translation of the modern Chinese name. Chinese New Year celebrations traditionally run from Chinese New Year's Eve, the last day of the last month of the Chinese calendar, to the Lantern Festival on the 15th day of the first month, making the festival the longest in the Chinese calendar. Because the Chinese calendar is lunisolar, the Chinese New Year is often referred to as the "Lunar New Year."

So happy New Year every one! I wish you all nothing but the best.

Letter to A on his 3rd Birthday

Dearest A,

Today you turn 3. I can only hope that you had a day full of love, laughter & joy. I know more than likely however, this was not the case & this makes me sad. Your mommy & daddy thought of you a lot & even had a birthday cupcake for you...3 candles & all! We took pictures with your cupcake to put in the picture book that we will be sending you.

We had people sending us messages, wishing you happy birthday too! You are so loved already by so many people & this warms my heart.

We cannot wait to have you home with us & get to throw you a birthday party. Your 4th birthday will be amazing! Mommy will not cry because she cannot be with you, I will probably cry because I get to see you experience your first birthday party in the states.

Know how much we love you & cannot wait to have you in our arms...to experience all the 1st with you.

Love,
Mommy & Daddy

School for the Deaf Tour

Last week we went to tour a school for the deaf. To be honest, I was a nervous wreck before we went in as I truly did not know what to expect...and when I get nervous, well, my sign language gets all 'hand tied.'

From the moment we walked in the door, my breath was taken away. The school was not what I was expecting! I imagined a school where nobody talked but the teachers (even though I knew the students were taught bilingually). We started with the preschool program. It is a Montessori program, which boogles my mind. I agree with it & all..but it seems like chaos to me. So against every way I was ever taught.

In preschool & kindergarten the school allows hearing children. They feel it is important for the hard of hearing and deaf children to be able to socialize and communicate with hearing children. All of the hearing children are hand picked for the program & they must know sign language. They are all CODAs, grandchildren of deaf, children of interpreters, etc. Walking into this room and watching everyone interact and play was amazing...you had no idea who was deaf & who was not. Same goes for the pre-k class we saw. All the teachers talk & sign and everything is done bilingually, so you really cannot not tell the difference in the children.

Once the children go to kindergarten, the hearing child must leave the school. Due to the fact that is much harder for deaf and hard of hearing children to read and write, they really hit it hard at this school come kindergarten.

We went to visit the kindergarten class made up of 3, profoundly deaf children. Shocked does not even describe how we were once we walked in this room. This room was so loud with chit chat! These 3 profound deaf children were not only signing to each other, but talking up a storm! They were reading at a 2nd grade level and their math skills (also hard because of reading concepts, etc) were above par...we were blown away.

We then went on to see the 1st & 2nd grade classes, each just as amazing as the previous. This school knew deaf, that is for sure. From the technology that they had throughout the school to match frequencies of hearing aids to the simple things like a green house..this place had it all.

This school knows deaf, what can I say. Things I had never thought about when it comes to a traditional school..like tile flooring. This school is all carpeted in order to help muffle other noises since hearing aids amplify all sounds.

Once our hour tour was over, we left knowing that this is were A will be...at least until 3rd grade. If he stays there until high school graduation or if he mainstreams, that will be determined on how he does & what he wants...but I can say, after the tour...we know this is the school for him! We want him to have the best education & to have all the opportunities in the world. This school, well, I feel like they will give him all that & more. Just as we wish to teach him that there is nothing he will not be able to do..this school will only help reinforce that.

I am excited to see how he blossoms & what will happen once he is in school (minus the fact that I already cry at that thought of sending him to school!)

Signing

So as I have mentioned, A is deaf. We do not know the extent of his deafness & will not until we get him here to the states. The test the run in his country do not tell the things doctors here need to really understand his deafness. It does not show pitch or anything, so we have no idea.

We have heard stories of child getting here to the US & their ears just needed a good cleaning because the wax build up was causing them not to be able to hear...but in our hearts, we feel he is profoundly deaf. After seeing videos of him, it is just a gut feeling and we are totally ok with that.

We fell in love with A the moment we saw him, before we even read his bio. The sparkle in his eye and his smile & we were hooked. Reading that he was deaf did not phase us in the slightest. We have always said we would be open to a deaf child.

I've always been interested in sign language. When I was in 2nd grade, I would walk around the house & act like I was signing as I talked. I have no idea where this came from, as I had never been around a deaf person. My parents then decided it would be a good idea to put me in a summer school sign language class. I remember having kids books on signing and watching things on TV, I was hooked. Unfortunately it did not start as a language at my high school until I was a senior, so I never took it then, but in college, I was able to. I was able to embrace the deaf community locally and really get involved. You have heard people say they love French or even Italian..they fall in love with the language & the culture...well, that was me with signing.

I loved that with sign language I was able to help deaf people when they least expected it. From a guy at a bar one night trying to order a drink or a family shopping. My husband was with me when I was able to assist the family shopping & he said that was really when he wanted to start learning & thinking more about a deaf child. He said the look of pure joy on the family's face when I started signing to them was priceless.

My mom is convinced that because of everything that drew me to signing I was always meant to learn to be A's mom. She says it was truly meant to be.

Just because I have taken classes, just because my husband & I continue to learn sign language, it does not mean it will be easy once A is home. He knows no sign language & gets by daily with gestures. I know he is smart though and I can only hope that once he starts to learn he will be so excited because he can finally communicate.

Maybe I was always supposed to be his mom....no, I know I was!

Holidays

Growing up the holidays were never that big of a deal. Work was so busy, we had so many birthdays & anniversaries to go along with them as well...in the span of 2 weeks we have my grandparents anniversary, my dad's birthday, Christmas, my birthday, my grandma's birthday and New Years. So when my husband came along & his birthday was the same day as my grandparents anniversary..it only made sense to add it to our crazy mix. Then we found A & well..his birthday too is in the mix, so why not!!

So with all of the happenings, everything really was never special...too much going on to make everything special. To me, the holidays are just a few days off in the craziness that I can finally relax & catch up on sleep. This year however, this year is totally different.

I get teary just writing this. It's hard...it's so hard not having our little man home with us. Our first Christmas since becoming parents & he is not here with us. He will also be turning 3 & we will not be there to celebrate with him.

For a time of year that normally just meant craziness to me, it has a whole new meaning & damnit, that meaning is making it hard for me. I cannot wait to have him home & make the holidays different than they ever were for me. I want everything to be magical...special, not crazy. I am so giddy about the holidays next year...but until then, I will cry. I will be sad he isnt here.